Science Jokes

A physics student was hit by a brick falling from a house. He fainted, but came to after a while and started smiling. The onlookers were worried, so they asked him why the smile. "I just realized how lucky I am because the kinetic energy is only half m v squared." A neutron walks into a diner. "I'd like a a cup of coffee" he says. The waiter promptly serves a cup of coffee. "How much will that be?" asks the neutron. "For you?" replies the waiter, "no charge"

Why did the chicken cross the road?
Issac Newton: "Chickens at rest tend to stay at rest. Chickens in motion tend to cross the road."

Q: What did the Nuclear Physicist
 have for lunch?
A: Fission Chips.

 

Q: What happens when
 electrons lose their energy?
A: They get Bohr'ed.

Old mathematicians never die; they just lose some of their functions.

 
 

Q: Why did the statistician cross the interstate?
A: To get data from the other side of the median.

Q: How many MIT students does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Five --one to design a nuclear-powered one that never needs changing, one to figure out how to power the rest of Boston using that nuked lightbulb, two to install it.

 

Two atoms bump into each other. One says "I think I lost an electron!" The other asks, "Are you sure?", to which the first replies, "I'm positive."

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
Albert Einstein: "Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road crossed the chicken depends on your frame of reference."
 

Jeff Danger, Science Ranger
Cool Science Show for Kids
Phone (617) 899-4140  jeffdanger55@yahoo.com

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